Monday, March 28, 2016

It is hard and it is good.

March 10th the judge approved our adoption. 

And I almost don't believe it because we've waited for so long for this to happen. 


Years of trying to figure it out, years of trying to get it done and months longer than we expected of waiting for the decision all came down to one email from the lawyer sent seemingly casually on a Thursday afternoon -  Your case was today. We will translate the documents and send them to you soon. 


That was it. Suddenly all of the waiting was over. The boys were ours - the boys are ours. 



And I have read blogs and books and stories that say "adoption is the hardest thing you could ever do!" 

And I have read blogs and books and stories that say "adoption is the best thing you could ever do!" 

From what I have seen I would say yes! 

 To both of those things. 

It is hard and it is good. 

It stretches me in more ways than I can figure out sometimes to deal with paperwork and finding enough money for it and remembering all of the important details in the process and then still remembering these little people are struggling with pasts bigger than they can carry some days. 

The judge saying yes brought smiles to everyone's faces. It still does when we talk about the boys' new names. It still does when we realize we're so much closer than before. 

The yes doesn't change all the hard parts though. There are still days when the boys pasts catch up with them and they question how loved they are. There are still days when they are broken, when we are broken together. 

Adoption has also given me a deeper understanding of what grace is, what love is - both loving and being loved, how it is costly and rewarding at the same time. And that we can come into their brokenness and stay. And the more we stay the more we see the brokenness healed. 

So today we are one step closer to a paper saying what we has been true in our hearts for years now. 

We are one step closer to being an official family with passports the same color. 

We are one step closer to knowing what it looks like to say God's love is enough to cover all the brokenness and his grace is enough to make all the struggle beautiful.  




1 comment:

Naomi Q said...

So happy for you all - and right with you on the best and hardest coexisting in this beautiful journey. Praying for your family - for healing in hearts, and a deeper understanding of His gracious forever love! Love you, friend!!